One reason we believed we were drawn to the Ukrainian adoption program was because when you go to adopt your child, you comenhome with your child (bearing no crazy complications). The whole adoption can be done in one trip. You don't have to go and fal in love with your child then say goodbye and come home and wait months for a court date before you can bring your child home. And yet somehow, here we are adopting from a country that does just that.
Knowing how unpredictable adoptions and life can be, I try to SOMEWHAT keep myself detached from the actual children we are praying to adopt...please keep in mind we haven't actually met them yet. I'm a passionate person and completely believe God has called us to these 2 precious children so when I say "somewhat" I really do mean just a bit, no way I could possibly keep myself completely detached. But something has changed.
Over the past week or so, there have have been insanely freezing temps in Eastern Europe....we're talking like 34 degrees BELOW ZERO!! People without heat or homeless are freezing to death. While I'm praying for all peoplemin EE, I have very special prayers for our little girls..Alyssa, Piper and of course Flower. Please God, keep our babies warm.
Last night I had a dream about trying to find our little girls. Now today, that somewhat detached feeling I've been clinging to has disappeared. My babies are so far away!
As we were worshipping in service today, singing about how big our God is, how He is so powerful and in control of everything, tears streamed nonstop down my face as I realized that I have to trust Him to care for our babies until we can get there (of course, even once they are home we will have to trust Him to watch over them and protect them even in our care but...).
I don't know if they are cold. I don't know if they are hungry. I don't know if they are scared. I don't know if they are getting hugs, kisses and tummy tickles. My heart aches; it truly truly aches. I feelin a yearning for my girls that seems can become absolutely unbearable. I have to believe God is allowing me to feel this burden for our girls for at the very least, 2 reasons. 1. So I will continue to cling to Him and trust Him through this process (it likely will be 10 more months until they are home with us). 2. So that I will keep them covered in prayer.
As much as my heart aches for our babies, I find comfort in it believing this further confirms they are our childre. When Dan wasn't sure yet if we were being called to adopt 2, my heart broke and I cried. I didn't cry the spoiled brat cry because I didn't get what I wanted. I cried a cry that came from this burden on my heart I could not ignore. I knew and know in my heart that both girls are our daughters and I cannot leave either of them behind.
What's really cool though, is that each time we are in the process of adopting, I pray for the specific children I believe God is calling us to adopt AND for the children He has chosen for us from before we were born, that we don't even know about yet. That means I've been praying for these little girls for years.
And, if their orphanage is anything like the ones my children were in, they will be fine. Remember too, that their winter clothing is far warmer than we can purchase here unless we are at an "outdoor" store.
ReplyDeleteI did hear from a FB correspondent who works at the WORST (i.e. poorest) orphanage in the region my children were in, and he assured me everyone indoors is warm.